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It’s time to do what’s right for me,
it’s ok to be selfish, it’s ok to shape my life the way that feels right for me, acknowledging that the shape of life changes. People will disapprove, telling you you’re wrong, insisting you change for their sake, not yours. Why pretend, why wear masks, why portray a shape of life that is ill-fitting just to please others it’s just not worth it, really it isn’t. It’s time, time to be happy, to unlearn unhealthy rhythms and patterns of life if not I will stay in this rut, the quagmire of my unlived undeveloped life I am worth investing in myself, my ideas and plans for all that makes me flourish, feeds my soul. It’s a learning experience, life, not everything will go smoothly there will be hitches along the way it’s part of the learning experience I want to work on being the best version of myself to figure out who I am, to uncover the authentic me, without judgment or shaming parts of myself that I’ve wrestled with or denied I need to love my holistic whole self my body, my mind and my soul to do what makes me happy, to take ownership of myself, to make decisions and choices to make values and root them to cultivate and nurture them then to watch and see me flourish in fruitfulness.
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Word within the word,
the seed, the spark, the alpha into the omega, the pure essence, the fragrance of the beloved, the sound the space [ ] Breath deeper Love wider pray longer word becoming, in dwelling. in us, fragile, meek, and lost, word into flesh, embodiment, atoned, rewritten, cut and scorned, God, now, here, always. The God of my understanding
God speaks to us most clearly through silence, In absence, through our unknowing, knowing ungendered, unattainable but present, knowing us, getting us. Seeing humanities quirkiness even struggles yet somehow loving us beyond time and space, blind to borders, hate and otherness. God abides not in one single religion, or one space, God is beyond our limiting brains, this we must embrace. God is with us, with us right now. In the silent place of your soul, the soul the womb of God, God is stirring, listen, you might hear, listen with ears, mind and heart.  Look
Look with creator eyes at the cornucopia of colour emerging from within the leaves, leaves with vibrate earthy, natural colours, a last shot of energy, sap, then the leaves flurry to the ground, leaves turn to mush, energy returned to the ground, ready to energise, to give life again, but now rest -- Smell with creator senses, alert, tender and true. Leaves, petals, once shouting out with colour abound, that deathly returning to the earth, all strength, resistance, life, colour drained, body broken down, life extinct The crunch of autumns deathly comes Smell overwhelming of energy pouring back into the earth the body, now a lifeless corpse, buried nurturance for life’s best rest now until spring’s forth. 2 Cor 5:17 – Created a new – the old life is gone; a new life burgeons. Change is in the air Caterpillar enveloped Enveloped in homemade chrysalis Burial gown? Grave of the old earthly bond body Death seeps in…… Cells, structure collapse life blood flows out, held, ready. Darkness, silence, confusion. This liminal space This hard place Death is held here. then, as if all hope was totally lost a quickening pause of energy strikes an urgent plea is sounded Prophesy Prophesy this new life into being Speak words of Hope Love Encouragement. this liminal space becomes a womb birthing into a new reality Suddenly Cells grow and knit together Structure builds colours emerge. The butterfly exhausted Emerges Flaps its wings and fly’s This thing of beauty flying above Lopping in and out, flying high, flying low Change is birthed again. mr blackbird
I saw, I noticed, one of your young, died he was on the cold earth, motionless his soul free now from the limitation of its earthly body soaring high he looked perfect no sign of attack mr blackbird I could tell I could tell you were looking for him almost cancelling out the body on the earth near you you didn’t want to admit it who would? I removed his body to a safe place, at rest you calmed down, almost acknowledging, accepting your lose, knowing nothing more could be done for your son then you, yes you mr blackbird let out a heart-wrenching lamination you say, you noticed mr blackbird
you are a master listener you hop along, you stop, moving your head from side to side listening, listening carefully listening without interruption listening beyond time you hop again and again then suddenly you dive down deep under the earth, a wriggling worm is torn from it’s dark, moist world I wonder what you heard mr blackbird? do worms make a sound or was it a vibration maybe just a hunch mr blackbird, how do you hear? what do you hear? mr blackbird you inspire me to listen better, listen with sight, ears and other senses. mr blackbird,
I watched you for ages, you were in a meditative haze, orange beak open body in a contorted shape, like concord about to take off you were resting in mid summers spotlight shimmering in the haze like a sauna’s intense heat. you were living firmly in he moment, steadfast in another place, another world What do you dream of mr blackbird? mr blackbird sits precariously on his high tower, looking, sensing even knowing something is wrong
Then as if a switch is triggered he is brought to life, there is an urgency to his message, all is not well, you need to listen to me, take action, take cover mr blackbird uses all his energy to proclaim this message, this message that must be heard, despite the bedraggled worn out appearance mr blackbird uses his small frame to jump up and down, flap his wings for all their might, forcing out his message, the echo of his voice reverberating across shed and greenhouse, lawn and flowerbed This pulsating red hot message is passed on to other lookouts, there is a cacophony of noise as the message is received and re-communicated. Then, as if the switch is turned off, peace descends to the garden, the threat has ceased, moved on yet mr blackbird know’s never to rest, next time things could be different…… connected – discounted
satellite tv mobile phones social media we’ve never been so connected, says the advert all-consuming, hours, wasted on nowt, saturated with information, whizzing about the mind, anesthetised to reality, blind, numbing, shews life, feeds demons of the mind. Its time, time to disconnect. reconnect to reality reality in all its multifaceted colour embrace, government lost, lost in crisis. nhs – do we need to talk about it, resus or not? relationships with real people, learn to disagree well befriend people unlike you – be disturbed be different and live. connect to humanity, natural word. Connect to the heartbeat, the heartbeat of who you are, your place in the world, your home in nature, life in its fullest sense, taste and see. |
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